Dumped

Hello world, this is Angry Tofu speaking. I'm terribly sorry not to have posted for such a long time, I'm afraid my account was temporarily disabled due to misbehavior on my part (oops).
   Today I suffered some intense emotional turmoil, which caused an unnecessary amount of bawling and wailing, but I won't be hard on myself. Today I was dumped. Yes, I, the irrepressible Angry Tofu, was let loose into the cold and unfeeling world of Singledom. I have never mentioned it before, for the sake of privacy (but my soul has temporarily been sucked out of my being, taking with it any sense of reason), so I will inform you all now that I had a significant other. I had been in a relationship with this person for nine months and four days. And in my defense, there had been no signs of discontent on his part. He seemed perfectly happy, swimming along like a little salmon. Trust me, despite my young age I am quite familiar with breakup signs, my previous significant other managed to display ALL of them at one time.

1. Random displays of douche-iness
2. Randomly not calling you for, like, three days after he gets back from China *grr*
3. Threatening to knife you (yes, this happened)
4. Betting on you with his friends
5. Being a freaking jerk. Period. 

      If you notice any of these signs, ask yourself what the heck is going on. And why are you in this handbasket? Sorry, random reference to something and I'm not quite sure why I'm referencing it.
     The point is....well....what is the point of this? Oh, I know, I'm reaching out to the superficial support network of the internet to try and calm the cold, dark creature which has stirred in my stomach and wants to consume me with this new-found loss....
   Kay that was creepy. So, basically I just need a ton of ice cream in order to surmount this terror. And then I will be both very large and a stronger person.