Post-breakup ice cream

     Hello world, this is Angry Tofu speaking. Unfortunately my computer is acting up, so I will be unable to post the fitful and angry post (in the true spirit of this blog) that I was planning on, because that post required a photo. Which the computer will not let  me upload. Never fear, however, because I'm sure if I smack the screen often enough that by tomorrow it will be back in working order.
     So today I will talk about the significance of post-breakup ice cream. See, ice cream is both good for the soul and deliciously yum-tastic, but its metaphorical meaning is just too amazing not to be explored! Ice cream is cold, so much so that the mere idea of biting into it can send shivers down your spine. That moment of shock when you bite into something cold represents those brief times of clarity, when you can grab ahold of the idea that maybe being single is a good idea, that it's a good time to do some soul-searching, that you were tired of your ex's obsession with Minecraft. Of course, just as the ice cream quickly dissolves on the tip of your tongue, all semblance of rational thought is usual replaced within seconds by a blubbering cloud of sadness.
     Ice cream is also a common date food, meaning that in all probability you ate ice cream with your ex at some point during your relationship. This means that you deliberately chose to eat a food despite the fact that it will cause you to delve into memories, the sweet everyday kind that hurt the most. Now even thinking about ice cream is making me sad. Dangit. Anyway, ice cream is clearly benefiting off of the sadistic pleasure that humans seem to take in emotionally torturing themselves.
     Therefore, ice cream is evil. And so are breakups.